Hot Topic: Names

When my friend and I were lining up to buy a drink, he turned to me and asked, "what name do you want to give me today?" Confused, I managed to squeak out a, "James?" So when he stepped up to the barista, he used the name James for his order instead of his real name, which had Arabic origins and was unpronounceable to many western people. That incident wasn't the first. He told me that he uses different names every time he orders something, just for convenience.

Let's get to it:

I was blessed to have a name so pronounceable in nearly every language. I've never met anyone who struggled with my first name. My middle name, perhaps, and my last name, definitely. "How do you spell that?" is a common question when I have to pronounce my surname, which has Sanskrit roots.

My second sister knows firsthand how irritating it is to have a unique name with an even more unique origin. Her name is so rare that typing her name on Google will give you social media profiles of only her. She does not need to add her middle or last name for usernames; just her first name will suffice. However, the uniqueness of her name means having to repeat it more than once when she meets someone new. Or even just going by a completely different name to avoid confusion; a name that's light on a foreigner's tongue.

A name is your identity. Encased in the very few syllables of your name is the history of your family and the person your parents hoped you would be one day. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but it would wreak havoc amongst people if someone was to rename it to something else, no?

What I hate is how people simply refuse to pronounce someone's ethnic name correctly. Mispronouncing them due to lingual restrictions is understandable, but to call someone else by a completely different name simply because it's 'more convenient' is plain rude.

When my friend enrolled in my high school, he introduced himself with a name that was relatively easy to pronounce amongst the students, but the western teachers thought it was too difficult (it wasn't at all) and they butchered his name completely. Because of that, the students started to call him by his newly reformed name. Soon enough, the entire school called him a name different to the one his parents gave to him.

Another one of my friend took semesters worth of classes and yet his tutor still couldn't remember his name let alone pronounce it. "Is my name that hard to say?" he said to me that afternoon. "I didn't even tell him my entire first name, just my nickname, and he still couldn't remember."

I know so many people who have sliced their own names in hopes that people could pronounce it. They would drop the last few letters, or even add a few more. Why should it come to that? Why should people have to change their own names for other people? We were given our names for a reason, and it should be said as intended. It is not a foundation to build new names upon. It is not a name for you to chew in your mouth to fit into the molds of your teeth. A name is a slate of metal that should not be twisted or bent for your benefit. 

People should learn to pronounce names of different origins. Everyone should learn to wrap their tongues around the hard b's and rolled r's. We shouldn't adjust another person's god-given name just because it's slightly 'difficult' for us.

It's hard to describe to you the way someone's eyes light up when a barista spells their name correctly. The way they beam with joy when someone of a different race pronounce their names right. So when someone repeats their difficult name, you better listen hard and listen close. See the way their lips curl into a smile when you stumble on the consonants, but notice the grin on their face when you're finally able to utter it perfectly. Because it's not about convenience, it's about respect.