Hot Topic: Understanding Suicide


Most people think of suicide as something selfish and idiotic. You see a plethora of quotes attempting to turn suicidal thoughts into that of hope and happiness. The problem with these quotes is that rarely do they ever work. These quotes were made by emotionally stable people who know fuck all about the inner workings of the depressed and suicidal. And it is these people that end up writing about the selfishness of suicide when they're the ones who have it all wrong. You shouldn't judge the act of suicide but only understand it.

Let's get to it:

As individuals, we perceive reality differently, which means I take in events and life experiences completely differently to the way you do. What you find to be a speed bump, I might consider as bollards. Or what you take seriously I might let it pass like water off a duck's back. We cannot truly understand the mechanics of someone's mind, especially those brave enough to take their own lives.

Brave, you ask? Is that the correct adjective to describe suicide? Brave, by its very definition, means 'ready to face and endure danger or pain', and I think that definition is apropos to suicide. You can be brave by traversing life's misfortunes, because that, too, entails danger and pain. But people think that suicide is easy when in reality, a lot of thought goes into the act itself. It takes planning, sometimes for months or weeks, for the perfect means to the end. It is not easy to pull the trigger and allow your body to jump. The willpower it takes to end one's life is greater or equal to the willpower to carry on. When every cell and every heart beat is telling you to continue, you fight against the current. Our bodies were designed to fight, not to surrender, hence why taking your own life feels unnatural and mentally draining. No one attempts suicide without thinking it through. Most of the time, it's not an impulsive decision; it requires a lot of thought and careful evaluation. It is a decision, not a mistake, not a cop-out, but a choice.

When people say that suicide is selfish, it enforces the idea that we should all live our lives for the happiness of other people. Those who have contemplated or attempted suicide are not selfish; on the contrary, they deeply believe that their death would be the better option for them and the people around them. It's as if they're doing a favor for their friends and families if they were gone. Of course, this is rarely ever true. No one can disappear off the face of the planet and not affect another human being in one way or another. However, some believe that their own suicide is a selfless act; to lift the burden of their existence off their friends and family. Suicide isn't selfish, not to them.

They say that no one in their 'right mind' would commit suicide. That's true, but not all of us have the right minds. People often forget to take into account the fact that depression is a legitimate mental illness that takes lives. Just like how cancer has the ability to eat away your body, depression eats away your mind. Having severe clinical depression should be treated as seriously as stage 4 cancer, yet when someone dies of the latter, they are seen as strong and a fighter. Don't the mentally ill fight just as much? Don't they have to battle their own thoughts every second? The mind is as important as the body, and it's time that we view it as equals. You shouldn't reproach suicide with such judgement and criticism if you haven't felt the darkness of depression, or any mental illness for that matter. Instead of seeing the act of suicide from the point of view of those affected by it, try seeing it from the side of the depressed, because rarely do people try to understand the pain they feel.

Some people say they are pro-choice and that they believe everyone should have the right to their own bodies. This argument is often used for pregnant mothers who wish to terminate their pregnancy, however, could that belief also be extended to the lives of individuals? If we are in control of our bodies, don't we have the right as a human being to do what we want with it?

Arguing in favor of suicide might sound a bit odd, but I'm not condoning it at all. Suicide has such a stigma behind it when it shouldn't. Those who commit or attempt suicide are ill, but just because you can't see the broken bones doesn't mean they're not broken inside. Suicide is a difficult act to execute, and those who are brave enough to do it shouldn't be shamed, they should be treated like any other death; with respect. Because sometimes life isn't for everyone, and those who choose to walk out of it prematurely should be seen as those not strong enough to continue.

“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.” - David Foster Wallace

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